Unbeautifully Loved (Breathe Again) (19 page)

Mollie eyed both carefully, going back and forth before pointing to my right. “Black dress, my black peep toes with the bow on the back, and I have the perfect necklace to go with it.” Mollie hopped off the bed and headed towards the door, but stopped and looked my way. “Smoky makeup, and pull your hair half up, leave the rest in soft curls.” She headed to her room, leaving me to get ready.

I was ready before Mollie got back with the rest of my outfit.

“Okay, got everything. Sorry, I couldn’t find that necklace– holy shit, you look hot,” Mollie said stopping dead as she came bursting into my room and handed me what I needed. “Here.”

I slipping on the heels and necklace, I looked at myself in the mirror, unsure of what I saw. “You don’t think it’s too much do you?” I asked turning to look at Mollie, worried I overdid it.

“You look good Lexie, really
really
good. Lukas is going to flip when he sees you. Bud, look at mommy, doesn’t she look nice?”

Finn looked up from his game. “No, mommy looks pretty.” He looked at me smiling then went back to playing.

“Thanks baby.” I winked at him.

“Okay,” I said taking a deep breath. “I’m gonna wait for Lukas downstairs,” I told Mollie nervously.

“I’m gonna get Finn ready for bed,” Mollie said. “Come on bud, say night to mommy.”

Finn hopped off the bed and walked over to me, giving me a one armed hug around my legs. “Bye mommy, love you. Say hi to Lukas for me.”

I crouched down to his level and pulled him into a hug. “I will baby, love you too.” I kissed the top of his head then let him go, watching him walk across the hall to his room.

“Have fun tonight honey and text me if you’re not going to be coming home.” Mollie wiggled her eye brows at me then started laughing.

“Mollie,” I said raising my brows at her.

Mollie didn’t know I was only going out with Lukas to prove to everyone, including her, that I didn’t have a thing for him. I knew if she knew, she wouldn’t be too thrilled but only because she was team Lukas.

“What I’m saying is you never know what will happen, one minute you’re talking then boom you’re kissing and next he’s got your dress over your head and you screaming his name in pure ecstasy. What…? It happens.” She said innocently with a one shoulder shrug.

I rolled my eyes, “Please, don’t mistake me for you Molls because that exact scenario happened to you after graduation.”

Her mouth pulled into a wicked grin remembering back to that night. “Brad Johnson, how could I forget him?”

“No idea. Anyways, did Erik text you?” I asked curious.

Erik, like Teri said, showed up at Fisher’s last night for a couple hours and a few beers. As soon as he walked in, both Bobby and Teri gave me knowing looks.

Sunday wasn’t a busy night, I had a few tables in between one another and it gave me free time in between to sit and talk to Erik. He had finally found and started work at some warehouse in the next town over; he didn’t mind that it was a twenty minute drive or that the hours were so scattered. I brought up the idea of him and Mollie maybe going out on date but he quickly turned down the idea but after a little bit of convincing he finally agreed and left with her number.

“Yes! He texted me last night, wanting to get together tonight but I told him you had dinner plans so we’re gonna hang out tomorrow night.” She beamed with excitement and I couldn’t help but smile at the fact that it was because of me.

And, if they started dating, everyone could get off my back about him.

“Good, he’s nice. I think you guys will hit it off pretty well,” I smiled.

At least I hope they do.

The doorbell rang interrupting us, “That’s for me,” I muttered grabbing my purse and jacket I had laid out earlier. “I’ll see you later Molls, thanks again,” I said walking by her, stopping to give her a quick kiss on the cheek before rounding the corner and down the stairs.

“Be safe!” Mollie yelled and her laugh rang throughout the upstairs as she made her way to Finn’s room.

I shook my head. There wasn’t going to be anything happening between Lukas and me, other than dinner and coming back here, changing out of this dress and into a pair of sweats.

This wasn’t a date. This was me proving to Teri, and everyone else, that there isn’t anything going on between us and that I wasn’t harboring any hidden feelings for him.

So I’m going to have dinner with him and then that would be the end of it, and maybe he will leave me be. Or maybe it will be a great time and by the end of the night I’ll want his lips all over me, in more ways than one.

Not knowing where that thought came from I pushed it away, as far as I could, and cursed myself for allowing the thought to be processed, even if it was only sex.

Only sex.

People had that kind of relationship all the time, have all the sex you want without the relationship part. Even though I told him I didn’t do that, what would be the harm? He’s get what he wants– sex and I’d work him out of my system than once we both got what we needed we’d toss each other aside when someone better came along.

We’d really be helping each other out, what was so wrong with that? Not like it would ever be anything serious between us anyways, he had to know that– why else would he want to go out with me.

Someone so damaged– broken beyond repair, who doesn’t know the first thing about being in a normal relationship other than a backhand to the face when you fucked up.

I was temporary, until something better came along.

You can’t get hurt when you’re not emotionally involved.

“Okay,” I said under my breath, agreeing to my thoughts as I reached the door feeling extremely anxious and sick to my stomach.

Well, here goes nothing.

I took a breath as I opened the door to Lukas and my heart slammed against my chest and a jolt of electricity shot between my legs instantly melting my panties away.

He was still in his clothing from earlier but he looked good, fuck he always looked good. He could wear jeans and a leather jacket like nobody else I knew. Taking in the sight of him, I melted in the hot flames that licked my entire body, and I met his hot and stormy gaze as he looked over every
single
inch of me.

“Fuck,” he growled, his eyes blazing with want and need.

“Lukas.” I breathed out the breath I didn’t know I was holding while gripping the door handle tighter.

He reached out, and placed his hand on the side of my waist softly pushing me back into the house closing the door behind him and I stumbled back in my heels, “What are you doing?” I asked confused.

He took another look at me before his eyes came to mine. They were unlike I’d ever seen them, dark and on fire; full of lust. I gripped his biceps to keep steady on my feet as my knees quivered.

He walked, backing me up until my back was flat against the closet door and he placed his hands flat by my head, boxing me in. His scorching body was so close to mine; we were just barely touching, inches away. His beautiful face, with a week’s worth of scruff was all I could see.

I wanted to run my hand along his jaw, and feel the roughness of his facial hair scratch against my hands. I wanted to know what it felt like against my neck, against my bare stomach and most of all, what it felt like against the inside of my thighs.

“Aren’t we going?” I ask him, shaky and barely above a whisper. I wasn’t sure if he heard me or not. Hell, I barely heard me.

His hand came away from the door, his knuckles lightly brushed across my cheek and down my jaw so soft and gentle that my eyes fluttered shut. I felt his rough, callous hand slid slowly down my neck over my bare collarbone, before gliding slowly down, against the fabric of my dress, brushing the side of my breast softly with his thumb, lingering a few seconds as I gasped in a breath.

My eyes opened slowly, and I felt my nipples hardening at his touch. The warmth between my legs intensified and throbbed, aching for more. Our eyes were locked on each other, the connection unbreakable as his hand continued gliding along the side of my ribcage, down to my hips and slowly moving around to my backside. He cupped my left ass cheek rough, pulling my hips closer to his so my back was arched away from the door.

His hand slid down in a quick motion, grabbing the back of my thigh, and throwing it around him, grinding his hips into me. I could feel him through his jeans as he pushed against me. A soft moan escaped from my mouth, feeling him against me, only a small amount of fabric separating us.

His hand still wrapped around my bare thigh, his other hand came to rest on the side of my waist. Dropping his forehead to mine he closed his eyes, took a deep breath as if trying to regain his composure, then opened them only to look into mine. I could feel his heart beating rapidly against my chest. “If Finn and Mollie weren’t upstairs right now babe, I’d be buried so fucking deep inside you right now,” He growled pushing into me more.

“Oh, God,” I moaned, not meaning to say it out loud but I didn’t care, I didn’t give a shit if he knew the effect he was having on me.

His words made the ache almost unbearable, the cliff of ecstasy so close. I wanted to grab him, crash my lips to his, while I ripped off his shirt, and he buried himself so deep inside me before he fucked me against the wall– my legs wrapped tightly around his waist.

“This dress and those shoes are for me, no one else Peaches. This is what you do to me.” He pushed into me again, “So,
only
for me.” His voice was rough, like he was having a difficult time holding himself back.

“Lukas,” I whispered.

“I have to go back to the station babe; it’s this case I’m looking into. I got the call on my way here,” he said sounding displeased.

I stilled.

No.

“Oh... Okay,” I said trying to hide the disappointment in my voice and cover with a small smile.

His hand came up, resting on the side of my cheek turning my head to look at him, his face soft, “Lex believe me, if it was any other case there would be no fuckin’ way I’d leave you in
that
dress and
those
shoes.”

“Lukas, it’s okay, it’s your job and I understand,” I told him, meaning every word though still feeling slightly disappointed. “Maybe another time.”

“Not maybe Lex, there will be another time. No way I’m passing up seeing you like this again, not a fuckin’ chance.”

“Okay.”

“You’re upset,” he murmured searching my eyes. “And disappointed.”

“Maybe a little bit, but only because I haven’t ate,” I teased, “and I’ve had this dress for, I don’t know how long, and it’s the first time I’ve worn it.” I tugged my lip in between my teeth, looking at him shyly.

“Fuck, as of right now, I hate my job,” he said glumly as he released my leg from around him. Once I had my balance he pulled me away from the wall and with him towards the door.

My hands slid up, resting on his biceps. His skin was soft and warm to touch; one would never go cold with him around with the heat that radiated from his body. “It's fine, go. I’ll hang with Mollie tonight.” I gave his bicep a squeeze. “Really it’s okay.”

He leaned in and brushed his lips against mine, “I’ll be back once I get this shit dealt with.” “Promise.”

“Lukas, that’s not necessary, I’ll probably be –”

“The image of you right now is so far burned into my head, it makes my dick twitch. I’m coming back Lex.” His deep voice hit me, making me shiver. “Another day isn’t passing without me having you.”

Okay.

“Okay,” I whispered then leaned in and softly kissed the bottom of his jaw.

I don’t know what possessed me but I pulled away from him and walked over to the small table Mollie and I had bought recently and grabbed the spare house key that was sitting in the dish, and handed it to him. “In case it’s late and I’m already in bed.”

Lukas didn’t say anything, his hand wrapped around the key and my hand, squeezing it once then took it and walked out the front door.

Heart racing I placed my hand against the wall and brought my leg up, slipping each heel off then headed back upstairs to change. As I hit the top of the stairs Mollie came out of Finn’s room, halting when she saw me, her brows knitted together. Before she could say anything I motioned for her to follow me into my room where I tossed the shoes across the room into the corner and threw my coat and purse into my chair.

“Lexie, what the hell, why aren’t you out with Lukas? Fuck, did you back out or something?” She put her hands on her hips, eyes narrowing in on me. “Do I need to give you the ‘he’s not Dex’ speech again?”

Always with the assumptions.

I slid out of my dress and hung it back on its hanger, trying not to shoot daggers at her. “Firstly,” I said turning to face her in only my dark purple lacy bra and matching panties, hands on my hips, “no I don’t need to hear one of your speeches. I know Lukas isn’t Dex. And secondly, I didn’t back out or cancel. He did, he got called into work, something about a case he’s working on.”

Mollies hands dropped to her sides, her brows smoothed. “Oh.”

Yeah, oh.