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“Although, if I have anything to do with it, you won’t be leaving for quite a while.”

My heart seriously skipped a fucking beat. My body flushed with excitement.

“What if we get snowed in and I have to stay a while? You may grow tired of me.”

“Oh, I’ll be
tired
all right, but it won’t be
of
you, it will be
because
of you.”

He winked at me as he opened the passenger side door of the truck and offered his hand to me to help me climb into the cab. Warm, heated leather molded to my backside, adding to the warmth of my body that Andris had created with his words. He shut the door and walked around the other side to climb in. I had a small sudden flash of fear as Link came to mind. How would he feel about my new relationship with Andris? Would he be angry? Would he even care? Did I want him to?

Thoughts and questions swirled in my head until Andris finally climbed into the cab of the truck and broke me from my thoughts.

“Wow. That was an intense look.”

“Hmm?” I asked, looking over to him.

“You looked very serious when I climbed in just now. Are you sure you are okay with this, Nicola?”

“Already trying to analyze me, Doctor?” I said with amusement in my voice and a smile upon my lips. When he didn’t return my amusement, I placed my hand on his thigh, momentarily lost in the feel of him beneath my hand before I found my voice.

“Of course I’m okay with this. More than okay. I was just thinking—how—how does Link feel about this?”

Andris started the truck and the rumble of the motor could be felt through the leather seats beneath my body, enhancing with synchronization the already intense buzz of my body with the closeness of Andris. I moved across the bench seat of the truck until I was shoulder to shoulder and thigh to thigh with him. The familiar electric spark of heat hit me the instant we touched and for a brief moment I allowed my eyes to close and relished in the feeling. It felt amazing to finally feel that sort of feeling with another person, especially with a man who, with every second that passed, became that more etched into my soul.

“I saw Link just before I came over. He is okay with our arrangement. However, you are still under the terms of the contract for three more weeks.”

“Are you okay with that? I mean, are you going to be able to allow me to be with another man outside of our—”

“Relationship. You can say it, Nicola. In fact. I want you too. I want to move forward with the idea of you and me. That is, if you want it too.”

“I do. I must be honest with you, though. I—I also have feelings for him as well.”

He sat back in the seat, resting his head against the seat as he closed his eyes.

“I sort of thought you might. I appreciate your honesty. I must warn you about Link, though. For him it’s all about sex, Nicola. He doesn’t have the same feelings that I do.”

Woah.

“What feelings would that be?”

“That I can see myself falling in love with you.”

How many times could a person’s heart skip a beat in one night? Warmth radiated through me and I leaned into him instinctively and placed my lips on his. I probed until he opened to me and I slipped my tongue inside, devouring the taste of his mouth and completely loosing myself in the feel of his mouth on mine. I may have initiated the kiss, but he quickly took control, cupping my head and tilting it ever so slightly so that our mouths were aligned perfectly. We were both breathless when we finally detached from each other and I worked hard to try and catch the breath that was trapped in my lungs.

Wow.

Putting the truck in drive, Andris pulled out into traffic, one hand on the wheel, the other hand threaded through mine. In therapy, many doctors had given me romance novels to read to try and trigger an emotion or thought within me. There were several ones where a young girl would ride next to her crush or boyfriend in a pickup truck just like the one Andris and I were in now. Back then, I never even thought twice about what the girl was feeling riding so close to her man, but now having the experience myself? I had to say it was fucking awesome. I felt seventeen—experiencing love for the first time.

I couldn’t wait for what the rest of the night held in store for us. With the looming cloud of worry that hung over my head at what I had agreed to with Cardinelli, I didn’t want it to seep in and taint the evening that Andris had planned for us tonight. For a few hours I could put aside the dark and step back into the light that Andris created within me.

IT WAS TAKING ALL the control I could find not to pull the truck over on the side of the road and peel the sinful dress from Nicola’s body and ravish her on the spot. Her close proximity to me in the truck wasn’t helping to diminish the rapidly growing desire for her that nearly consumed me. Her scent filled the cab and my nostrils, and on its own it was an aphrodisiac.

The ride back to my apartment felt like it took forever. I drummed my fingertips on the steering wheel to keep from groping her in the truck. The whole drive over I had to try and convince myself that I was doing the right thing. She was no longer going to be my patient, so ethically I could make her mine. Emotionally, however, I was struggling. My feelings for her grew fast and hard, repercussions be damned. I didn’t have time to slow down or be able to think about how it would affect her if she found out the truth about me. I didn’t want her to find out how weak and insecure I was when it came to women. Link had helped me to conjure some confidence before I went to pick up Nicola, but not enough to shake that flagging niche in the back of my mind that told me I was going to fail at this.

If I ever wanted anything to work in my life, it would be her.

I helped her from the truck, enjoying the warmth of her palm as our fingers laced together. I felt the slightest tremble in her hand and it echoed my own. She was nervous too, and in an odd way it was comforting to me to know that.

When we got to my penthouse, the scent of the chicken masala I had prepared earlier hit us as soon as I opened the door.

“Wow, something smells wonderful,” she said as she shed her coat and once again revealed the red dress that was doing powerful things to my cock. Nicola was beyond beautiful. She had to do little to her appearance in order for that beauty to reflect her, yet the small touches that she did do only enhanced it. She had a model quality about her, as clichéd as it sounded. She could give any movie actress a run for their money and make even the most committed man want to have a sinful affair with her.

“I made dinner before I came to get you. I hope you have no food aversions.”

“Wow. So many talents, doctor. I do believe I hit the jackpot,” she said in a playful tone.

“Have a seat and I’ll serve it.”

She walked to where I had an elegantly decorated table in the dining room that was connected to the kitchen. I picked up a lighter from off the bar and lit the tall pillar candles on the table and then dimmed the lights to where the flames danced upon the walls. The tall vase of red roses in the center of the table filled the small space with a sweet, floral aroma that accented the wine from the chicken masala.

All throughout dinner, I could barely contain myself. Even the way she chewed was turning me on to the point I felt like my body was going to rupture from the growing tension. It needed her. I needed her, but I also wanted to take this slow. When it came to Nicola, fucking up wasn’t an option.

We retired to the living room where I pressed a button on the remote that instantly lit the fireplace. We sat closely on my oversized couch, enjoying a glass of wine and engaged in conversation.

“Dinner was wonderful, thank you.”

“My pleasure. Cooking is something I have always enjoyed.”

“Lucky for me then, because I suck at it,” she giggled before she took another sip of her wine. I watched her throat bob as she swallowed, my lips begging to be pressed against the smooth, tanned skin of her neck.

“How could you suck at it?”

“Well, growing up I had cooks or maids who did it all for me. In school, all of our meals were either cooked for us or catered. I never got the opportunity to learn, really. When my parents died I ate whatever was available to me. Mostly that consisted of gas station junk food or takeout.”

“Well, maybe a cooking lesson will be in order. Next time we can make our meal together.”

“That sounds like fun.”

We sat in silence for several moments. I watched the heat from the fire match the heat in her eyes. We were both holding back, afraid of what would happen if either of us made that first move. I had thoroughly enjoyed her company so far, but dammit, if I didn’t have her soon I was going to go crazy.

I sat my glass on the coffee table in front of me before I reached for her, pulling her mouth to mine. The sweet taste of wine mixed with the normal taste of her mouth was incredible. She had quickly become something that I craved constantly. She lit me up. I was a stick of dynamite and she was the fuse that ignited something inside of me that only she could. She made me burn with need, and I would gladly go up in flames just to be with her.

“Nicola.”

“Hmmm?” She replied as I pressed hot kisses to her throat just like I had daydreamed about only moments before.

“I want you.”

“Oh thank God,” she breathed as if she had found the relief that she desperately needed. I sought her mouth once again, allowing our tongues to mingle and dance together in a perfect rhythm. Her hands came up to loosen my tie as I reached behind her and slid down the zipper of her dress. Removing her arms from the top, she allowed it to pool at her waist, exposing her sheer black lace bra to me. It was a sharp contrast to the fire-lit creaminess of her skin. I shed my shirt and tie leaving both of our upper torsos exposed to one another. This time when we embraced, our flesh touched and it was a glorious burning sensation that reached deep down into my chest.

You’re mediocre.

No. Fuck no.

You don’t deserve her, you worthless piece of shit.

I tensed as my father’s words echoed in the back of my mind. I had worked so hard not to allow him to invade my thoughts. Nicola had been a wonderful distraction and helped me keep him at bay all evening, but now that we were so close to intimacy, he came barreling in full force.

Nicola looked at me for a moment, recognizing something. Did she see my fear? My anxiety?

You’ve never had a woman that wasn’t blindfolded. You know she will run the moment you even try with her, so why even bother?

I closed my eyes tightly before opening them and finding Nicola looking right into them.

“Is everything okay?” She asked as her thumb stroked my cheekbone in a tender caress. I swallowed almost audibly, trying to rid the heavy lump that had developed in my throat. I wish Link were here. He would tell me what to do. He would tell me that my bastard father wasn’t actually here to hurt me. He would tell me that I deserved someone like Nicola. He would tell me that I deserved to be loved.

As if sensing something were wrong, Nicola pushed me back and stood up. This is what I feared. My lack of confidence to be able to make love to a woman like a normal human being was quickly becoming a reality. She was going to walk out, not wanting to be with a fucked up head case like me. I was prepared for her to retreat when instead, she pushed her dress down her hips, exposing her matching lace panties and garter belt. Briefly, my father’s thoughts escaped me and my mouth watered at the enormity of her beauty.