Keeping Secrets (8 page)

Shawndiece hated the look of defeat she saw in her friend. She wasn't used to that coming from Secret. Secret had always had a plan for her life and had been hell-bent on sticking to it. That plan was going to take her away from Flint where she'd live a prosperous and successful life. She no longer saw that fight and determination in Secret anymore.

“A baby is not the end of the world, Secret,” Shawndiece told Secret as she pushed her friend's bangs back from her forehead. “You can still live your dream.”

“Look, forget about dreams. This is the real world. This is my reality,” Secret said with conviction. “Now let's head down to your kitchen so you can do my hair. I got a date with my baby daddy coming up.”

Inside, Shawdiece was a little saddened that her efforts to talk Secret into sticking to her dreams fell on deaf ears. She really wanted Secret to be the one to succeed in life. But it was clear Secret's mind was made up. And as promised, Shawdiece would have her best friend's back no matter what. “Yeah, plus I need to school you a little more on how you need to play the type of nigga like Lucky.”

Shawndiece smiled, then led the way to her kitchen, where she would begin the process of transforming Secret from a book-smart good girl to a streetwise hood girl.

“You sure this skirt isn't too short?” Secret looked down at the denim mini skirt she was wearing compliments of Shawndiece. “And this shirt makes my boobs look extra big.”

“Girl, it ain't the shirt; it's that good bra you wearing,” Shawndiece told her.

The two were standing in front of the full-length mirror on the back of Shawdiece's bedroom door. Secret had decided to have Lucky pick her up at Shawdiece's house to avoid any chances of Lucky encountering her mother. The last thing Secret needed was for her mother to bring up the fact that she was pregnant and ruin the entire plan.

“Skylar bought it for me from Victoria's Secret.” Shawndiece cupped her hands underneath Secret's breasts and adjusted them. “It's expensive, so make sure you take care of it. Don't get into any of that wild sex where niggas start yanking your panties and bras off thinking that shit is sexy, all the while you want to send they ass a bill to replace yo' shit.”

Secret laughed. “Well, I wouldn't know anything about all that, and it doesn't sound like something I want to know about.” She smacked Shawdiece's hands away. “Now stop molesting my boobs and fix this piece of hair that won't stay.”

Shawndiece worked part time at the hair salon her mother owned, but she did more heads out of her kitchen. She still had to earn several more hours in order to earn her certificate from the School of Cosmetology. If the state was to come in and bust her at her mom's salon, the whole shop could get shut down. She didn't want to put her mother in jeopardy any more than she had to. But when her clients wanted services that were better suited to be done in the shop, Shawndiece did that at her mother's shop.

“I'm going to be hair stylist to the stars some day,” Shawndiece would say more so in play mode versus something she really believed could happen for her.

“If you hadn't changed shirts a million times, then a hair wouldn't be out of place.” Shawndiece grabbed the rat's tail comb that sat on her dresser and began to use the end to tuck any loose strands of hair from Secret's up-do.

“You sure that black one doesn't go better with this skirt than this orange one?” Secret tugged at the shirt she was wearing. To her, it was showing far more cleavage than she was used to. As a matter of fact, she wasn't used to showing any cleavage at all. So she surmised that perhaps it was okay.

“We not even 'bout to go there again,” Shawndiece spat, smacking the comb back down on the dresser. She was fed up with Secret second-guessing her outfit choices numerous times. “You wearing that shirt.” She looked her up and down. “You wearing that skirt and you wearing those wedges.”

Just then the doorbell rang.

“Perfect,” Shawndiece said. “Now you don't have time to change anything even if you wanted to. Now grab that orange Michael Kors bag and let's go.”

Secret, feeling like she was Shawdiece's little Barbie doll about to go on her first date with Ken, grabbed the purse, again compliments of Shawndiece. She strutted in the wedges she'd practiced wearing for about a half hour over to the bedroom door where Shawndiece stood waiting for her. She was excited to be going on her first date, regardless of her underlying intentions. On the flip side, she felt a little guilty inside as well. But every time guilt reared its ugly head she'd remind herself that she was doing this for the baby.

“Whoooo weeeee. Look at you lookin' like Beyoncé.” She put her hand on Secret's belly. “Don't worry, Blue Ivy, we gon' find you a daddy Jay-Z.”

“Will you stop it with your crazy self?” Secret said, slapping Shawdiece's hand off of her stomach.

“‘Got me lookin' crazy,'” Shawndiece began her own personal rendition of Beyoncé and Jay-Z's hit collaboration. She could tell she was starting to aggravate Secret as Secret rolled her eyes at Shawdiece. “Okay. Okay, I'm sorry. Let's go.”

The two headed down the steps just as the doorbell rang again. When they hit the bottom landing of the steps they each stopped and just stood there.

“What?” Shawndiece asked Secret.

“Aren't you going to answer the door?” Secret asked.

“Aren't you?”

“It's your house.”

“It's your baby daddy,” Shawndiece countered.

“Girl, get the damn door.” Secret pushed Shawndiece toward the door.

“If you can't open the door for him, how you gon' open your legs?” Shawndiece mumbled under her breath as she opened the door. “Well damn! Maybe I should have given your ass my number.” Shawdiece's hand flew over her mouth. “Did I just say that out loud?”

“Uhhh, yes, you did,” Secret came up behind her and said, placing her hand on Shawdiece's shoulder and pulling her out of the way.

“See? I told you to get the door,” she whispered.

Secret just rolled her eyes up in her head and looked to Lucky, who was standing there with a smile on his face, looking as dapper as could be.

“Sorry about my rude friend,” Secret told him. “But I can't say I blame her for the Freudian slip.”

“Oh, it's all good,” Lucky said. He stood there dressed in his Sean John button-up shirt with Sean Jean jeans. His blue, white, and gray Nikes matched the blue, white, and gray plaid pattern on his shirt. His eyes looked mysterious under the brim of his blue snap-back Nike hat, and his goatee was razor sharp.

“You look nice,” Secret complimented.
This is for the baby.
She had to remind herself of this as she felt guilt rising again.

“So do you.” He gave her the once-over. “Lookin' like an around-the-way girl,” he joked. What had attracted Lucky to Secret was that she was different from all the rest of the girls, but now here she stood greeting him at the door dressed like all the rest. He hoped he wasn't being duped.

“You have me to thank for the look Miss Secret is wearing tonight,” Shawndiece jumped in. “I styled her and am willing to style for the stars. Just send them my way.” Shawndiece brushed invisible dirt off her shoulders.

Lucky looked to Secret for confirmation.

“Yes, I have to give Shawndiece credit for this getup,” Secret admitted, her tone letting Lucky know this wasn't her typical style.

His guard went down. This explanation took care of his concerns. “Now all you need to be doing is waiting at the bus stop sucking on a lollipop.”

Secret laughed with him at the reference to the throwback LL Cool J song. “Well, I've already done the bus stop part, remember?”

“All right, you two, enough of the pleasantries. I've got a date too,” Shawndiece spoke up. She looked to Lucky. “You don't mind dropping me off around the corner right quick before you head out to wherever you going do you?”

Now Lucky looked Shawndiece up and down in her dark denim skinny jeans, green T-shirt, and green patent leather stilettos. She toted a green leather Ralph Lauren bag. “So you got all cleaned up for a brotha and he can't even come pick you up at your doorstep? You gotta go meet him out,” he said to Shawndiece.

“Oh, not by his choice,” Shawndiece clarified. “He got wheels; it's just that you can't let everybody know where you live at. I'ma meet him out, read him, and see how things is. If he all weird or something or have stalker characteristics, I'm probably gon' text Secret to have y'all scoop me up on y'all's way back home. Is that cool?” Shawndiece was as serious as a law school hopeful about to take their LSAT exam.

“Well, damn, seeming you have this whole thing planned out, I wouldn't want to ruin your plans and all, so I guess it is cool.” Lucky chuckled. “What the hell, you just wanna go out on our date with us and just say fuck ol' dude all together?” He was being sarcastic.

“Naw, but good lookin' out,” Shawndiece said as she dug her keys out of her purse and turned out the lights. That was everyone's cue to head out of the house.

Lucky extended his hand to aid Secret in stepping out of the house and onto the porch. “Your hands are so soft,” Lucky told her.

“Thank you,” Secret said. She hoped the makeup Shawndiece had put on her was hiding all the natural blushing of her cheeks.

Shawndiece locked the door and then followed Lucky and Secret to his SUV.

“Dang, this is you, Lucky?” Shawndiece said while ogling the beautiful, shining rims on his fully loaded Escalade. “You sho' is lucky. I likes this.”

“Thanks, ma,” he said as he clicked open the locks and proceeded to open the door for Secret. “Hold up, I got you, too,” he said to Shawndiece once he saw her about to get inside the backseat of the truck. “Damn, what kind of cats do you be dating for real? You ain't used to waiting for a dude to open the door for you?”

Shawndiece blushed and remained silent. Her answer would be in the negative. The only things most dudes were quick to open for her was a condom.

Both Secret and Shawndiece eyed each other, impressed by the chivalry Lucky was displaying.

Once Lucky got Secret all comfy inside the vehicle, he did the same for Shawndiece and then walked around to the driver side and got in. “I'm heading up north. Where you want me to drop you off?” Lucky asked Shawndiece before pulling off.

“Just drive. I'll let you know,” Shawndiece replied as they pulled off from in front of her house. After driving about a half mile Shawndiece pointed out a house. “Right here. This is good. The yellow house right there.” She continued pointing.

Lucky pulled up to a house that had several people hanging out on the front porch, shooting the breeze. Shawndiece went to open the door to get out.

“Girl, will you just hold up? I said I got you, dang,” Lucky said.

“Oh, yeah, my bad,” Shawndiece said as Lucky got out of the car. She then quickly leaned into Secret's ear. “Girl, it's all good. Ain't no other niggas tucked nowhere in the truck or anything, so you good to go.”

Shawndiece had insisted on pretending that she needed a ride from Lucky just so she could scope out the truck and make sure Lucky didn't have any of his boys inside pretending like they needed to be dropped off somewhere.

“Girl, you fresh meat and a dog can smell fresh meat a mile away,” Shawndiece had warned Secret. “And no matter the dog, they always got tricks. That nigga been done got you up in his car, have all his boys waiting inside thinking they gon' get a piece of you too. That's what happened to Tashayda. They slipped something in her drink and she for real-for real don't know who the daddy of her baby is.”

Shawdiece's cautionary tale had convinced Secret to go along with the little charade of her needing a ride to meet her date; all the while she was really just going over her cousin's house to kick it. And of course, there was no way she'd planned on texting Secret to come pick her back up considering Secret didn't have a cell phone. That was just another tactic to let Lucky know she'd be checking in on her girl, so not to do anything stupid.

“Thanks for everything,” Secret told Shawndiece as Lucky opened her door for her.

“Have fun.” Shawndiece kissed Secret on the cheek and then hopped out of the car.

Shawndiece headed up the steps where she was greeted by all the people on the porch with high fives, hugs, and “what up's.”

“So you ready to ride?” Lucky asked Secret as he parked himself back in the driver's seat and closed the door.

“Yep, all ready,” Secret lied. She was far from ready. She was as nervous as all get-out. She really wanted for him to let her out of the car so she could run and get some last minute advice from Shawndiece. But it was too late. Lucky pulled off. Now she was all on her own.

“Wow! This place is soooooo cute,” Secret said as she stepped into the dining area. When they'd first pulled up to what looked like a house, a big house, almost mansion-like, she was a little skeptical. Shawndiece had pounded it in her head that she was only to go to a public place with him. No stopping off over one of his boys' house so he could pick up something; none of that okey-doke. Shawndiece had warned her and given her scenarios to so much bad stuff that could happen.

“It's this li'l bed and breakfast–type spot I stumbled on once upon a time,” Lucky had told Secret, which had relaxed her and enabled her to allow Lucky to escort her from the car into the facility.

Secret found the décor to be exquisite.

“Yeah, I figured you'd like it,” Lucky said, all but patting himself on the back. “It takes a special kind of girl to appreciate this type of thing.” He looked around, admiring the not-too-fancy, but classy décor. The room could seat about twenty parties. It had a high ceiling with a chandelier hanging over each table that one might find in a middle-class home dining room. The tables were draped in white linen. The tables alternated with having a candle as a centerpiece or a flower in a crystal vase. The chairs were high back with a white cushion seat. The floors were hardwood, but each table was set upon a round white and gold rug that from a distance made it look as though each table was floating on a lily pad in a pond. It was darling and sophisticated; something Lucky figured a regular hood chick would think was corny and whack. He figured they'd prefer some expensive steak and lobster joint with a crowd for them to be seen.

“So, I'm special?” Secret asked.

“Huh,” Lucky stammered.

“You said it takes a special kind of girl to appreciate this type of thing. So does that mean I'm special?” Secret stood there with her hands clasped in front of her, blushing and looking pure and innocent.

“Girl, you know you're special,” Lucky answered. “You don't need me to tell you that. You're not like any of the other girls from these parts. As a matter of fact, are you from here?”

Before Secret could answer, a little blond-haired white woman, who appeared to be around her mid-forties, approached the couple. “Ahhhh, you must be our Lucky couple,” the woman greeted.

“Yep, that's us, the Lucky couple,” Lucky replied.

“I thought it was just way too cute when our receptionist told us someone had called and reserved the entire dining room for tonight for just two people. And when I asked her the lucky couple's name, she replied, ‘Lucky.'” The woman was cracking herself up as she held her stomach with laughter. “‘What a lucky couple,' I told her . . . no pun intended.” The woman lightly elbowed Lucky on the arm and bent over laughing.

Secret looked at Lucky and couldn't help but be amused by the woman's antics.

“Ahhh, anyway,” the woman said, getting herself together. “I'm Brook, part owner. My partner, Casey, who happens to be my real-life partner, and I have been running this place for the past three years now. We'd like to say it's one of Michigan's best kept secrets.”

“I've never heard of it,” Secret admitted, “but it is indeed a beautiful place you have here.”

“Well, thank you. But tonight, this place belongs to you. Just you. Now let me show you to your table.” Brook escorted Lucky and Secret to a table that was smack in the center of the room that donned a flower in a vase as its centerpiece. “My cousin Dustin, who is your own personal chef, will be out momentarily with your parade of delicacies. I do hope you will enjoy.” Brook did a slight bow and exited the room.

The table was round and large enough to seat six. Lucky pulled out a chair for Secret and assisted her in sitting. He then sat in the chair directly to her right.

“How are they going to begin bringing our food out when they haven't even shown us a menu and taken our orders?” Secret leaned in and whispered to Lucky as if the room had other patrons and she didn't want anyone to hear her.

“Because I took the liberty of ordering all the chef's specials in advance,” Lucky informed her. “I know how chicks be acting on first dates, just trying to order salads and not eat. Well, I beat you to the punch. So much food is about to start coming to this table, you're not going to be able to resist eating.”

“The sir is correct,” a man wearing a white chef suit and hat said as he wheeled a cart of food over to their table. “But first allow your palate to be whetted by our best house wine.” The chef set a wineglass in front of each of them. He then pulled a bottle out of a glass ice-filled bucket and filled their glasses halfway. He then placed the ice bucket next to the vase.

Next the chef laid out four different appetizers that he named and described. “I'll give you two a few moments to indulge before I return with round two.” He winked and then disappeared back into the kitchen.

Lucky picked up his glass. “Shall we toast?”

Secret stared at her glass, not bothering to pick it up.

“What's wrong? You don't like red wine. I can have him bring out white.” Lucky immediately began calling for the chef. “Hey—”

“No, no, Lucky, it's not that.” Secret stopped him.

“Then what is it?”

“Uh, I'm not old enough to drink. I'm only eighteen.”

Lucky let out air between his lips and shooed his hand. “Oh, is that it?” Most people he knew had been drinking since middle school, so that wasn't a big deal to Lucky. “These mutherfuckers don't care how old you are as long as I pay the bill. They ain't trying to card nobody or nothing.” He raised his glass again.

Secret was still resistant.

“What?”

“I . . . I don't drink.” Not only didn't Secret drink, but she didn't want to start now that she was with child.

“Oh, snaps. I didn't know. I didn't even ask. My bad.” Lucky wasn't used to this. All the girls he knew had been drinking since before half of them had even started their periods. He put his glass down.

“Please, you go ahead and drink up. Don't mind me. I'll just have—”

“Water. I forgot to bring your water out,” the chef said. He was right on time as he held out two glasses of ice water with a slice of lemon and lime in each. “Please don't hold that against me.”

“Thank you,” Lucky said. “You're right on time actually.”

The chef bowed and then once again disappeared.

“Okay, so now we can toast.” Lucky once again lifted his glass of wine.

Secret lifted her glass of ice water. “So what do you want to toast to?”

Lucky thought for a moment. “To getting to know you better.”

“Ditto,” Secret said as the two clinked their glasses and then took sips of their drinks.

“So, uhhh, like I was saying before, are you from here?” Lucky asked Secret.

“Yep, born and raised,” she told him, picking up one of the appetizers. She couldn't remember exactly what the chef had said it was, but to her, it was like an oval piece of mini garlic toast with tomato, cheese and some other herbs. She took a bite. She chewed and swallowed then added, “But I didn't always live in Flint.”

Secret proceeded to tell Lucky about herself, how she'd lived with her grandmother, her grandmother passing, et cetera. She found herself going on and on. The chef had come and gone about two or three more time with different choices of entrees each time. They'd sampled salads, soups, seafood, beef, chicken, and pastas. The chef had even whipped up a couple of nonalcoholic delights for Secret to indulge in upon Lucky's request.

By the time the chef brought out an array of desserts, three hours had passed and Secret had done most of the talking. She'd shared about her estranged relationship with her father, of course leaving out the details of her last visit with him. By the time they walked out of the bed and breakfast, they'd worked up a $1,500 tab, and that was on top of the fee he had to pay for reserving the dining room. They each felt like they'd gained five pounds. In addition, Lucky felt like he'd known Secret for the better part of her life, seeing she'd shared so much about herself with him.

“So did you enjoy yourself?” Lucky asked Secret as they walked down the walkway of the bed and breakfast and approached his truck.

“Oh, my God, did I ever.” Secret's eyes lit up. “For a first date ever, what more could a girl ask for?”

Lucky was about to open the door for Secret but then he paused. “You mean your first date with me.”

Uh-oh,
Secret thought. Shawndiece had spent so much time working with her so that she didn't come across as the rookie she was, and now here she'd gone off and spat the truth in spite of it all. “Uh, well.”

Lucky turned Secret to face him. “You mean, no guy has ever taken you out on a date before?” He waited for a response that he never got. “Niggas can be such lames. All they wanna do is sit up with a chick but don't ever wanna spend money and take her out some place nice. Don't worry, sweetheart. You used to them young and dumb high school niggas who don't know how to date. You got you a real man now, so get prepared for more nights like this,” Lucky told her, opening the door for her.

Secret only hoped he hadn't heard the huge gust of air she'd exhaled. He didn't think that she was some inexperienced pushover. He just thought she'd been with some lame, immature dudes who didn't know how to take a woman out. Shawdiece's efforts and teachings were not in vain after all.

Secret climbed up into her seat. She got nice and settled then realized Lucky was standing there just holding the door, staring at her. “What?” she asked.

He just shook his head. “I have no idea. I just got this feeling about you, girl.”

“Oh yeah,” Secret said in a sassy manner, bobbing her head on her shoulders. “Well, I got a feeling about you too, Mr. Lucky.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“And what's that feeling?” he asked.

Secret thought for a moment. “That you really are going to be the right one.” Secret didn't know much about Lucky. She didn't even have other guys to compare him with. But her instincts told her that he would be an excellent provider for her unborn baby.

“I feel that,” Lucky said as he went to close the door.

Secret held her hand out. “Wait, you didn't tell me what feeling you have about me.” Secret waited while Lucky stared into her eyes.

“I'm feeling like you the one I been trying to avoid.”

That wasn't remotely close to what Secret was trying to hear. A frown covered her face to reflect her reaction to his response.

“No, no, I don't mean it like that,” Lucky said. “I mean, keeping it real; I've kicked it with quite a few females. I love the female species. But I like to sample a lot of different flavors, as you can see by the menu I had arranged for us.”

Secret nodded, still waiting for Lucky to make his point.

“I never wanted to be that dude who finds this one flavor he really likes, get hooked on it, and then lose his appetite for all the other tasty flavors out there. You know what I'm saying?”

“Yeah, I think I do.” Secret turned her legs out of the car then used her index finger to signal Lucky to come in close.

He quickly looked to the side, licked his lips, smiled, then moved in close to Secret.

She immediately planted a soft, gentle kiss on his lips. She slowly slipped her tongue into his mouth. Before he could get into it and put his tongue to work, Secret pulled away. She then turned herself completely back in the vehicle, rested her hands on her knees, and looked straight ahead.

Lucky just stood there in a daze almost. It was almost like the roles were reversed. He was Snow White and had bitten the poisoned apple. Now here Secret had come along to kiss him on the lips and bring him back to life.

“What are you waiting for?” she turned and asked him. “You can take me home now.”

“Are you serious? You just gon' pretend like you didn't just . . . I mean, what was all that for?”

“What? Oh, you mean the kiss?” Secret played dumb. “Well that was just in case after tonight you decide you want to go dip your spoon into some other scoops of ice cream. I at least wanted you to have the aftertaste of my flavor to reminisce about.” Secret faced forward again and waited for Lucky to close the door.

He ultimately did, but before he did he said, “You know what, Secret? Something tells me you're the cure to my sweet tooth.” He closed the door and then did a light jog around the car to the driver side.

Secret looked down at her stomach, then said to her unborn child, “Looks like Mommy has found you a daddy.”