Love Me Always (I Hate You...I Think) (5 page)

"Really? All five?" I asked wide-eyed.
"Well, it usually takes more than that to get
you drunk. You ain't a light weight that's for sure."

Those words stirred inside of me. I wasn't a
lightweight. That means I drank a lot before I lost
my memory, and that didn't settle well with me. I
wasn't an alcoholic was I?

Shoving that thought as far from my mind
as possible I grabbed the first shot and downed it. I
cringed and gagged. Ever clear. That was strong
alcohol. And it took more than five shots to get me
drunk before? Ignoring that thought, I grabbed the
next shot and downed it. It was horrible, like
drinking rubbing alcohol. Next shot.

"Ever, I think that's enough. I don't think
your tolerance is what it was before," Oliver says.
Quickly I grab the fourth one downing it
before he can stop me. I wasn't even buzzing yet.

"Come on," I told him grabbing his hand.
He reached over downing my last shot and gave Jet
a look before following me to the middle of the
crowd. Oliver spun me around. That's the last thing
I remember.

~And Love Said No~
~Oliver~

Ever was so beautiful. She spun around
pressing her back against my chest. Her hair was
cascading down her shoulders, brushing the
strawberry red colored locks aside; I softly kissed
her scarred shoulder. I had no idea how much I had
missed her until now. My arms were wrapped
firmly around her waist as kissed up her neck. It
took me a moment to realize she was frozen still.

"Ever?" I asked unsure.

Abruptly she pulled away and spun looking
at me in shock. Mentally I cursed myself. She
hasn't regained her memory and I probably just
freaked her out.

"Sorry," I muttered running my hands
through my hair in frustration. I wanted to hold her
so bad I couldn't stand it but she wasn't ready for
that yet. I needed to take it slow. Without saying a
word, she moved to walk pass me. Holding out my
arm, I blocked her path.

"Ever, I know you don't remember me. I'm
sorry I didn't mean to freak you out."
She shook her head stepping back out of
my reach, "I just need a drink.”
She headed through the crowd toward the
bar before I could stop her.

Following closely behind I got to the bar
before Jet could hand her another drink. Clamping
my hand over the top of hers, I pushed the shot
glass back on to the counter top.

"Ever, you're already wasted. You don't
need anymore," I told her giving the glass back to
Jet.

"I can drink what I want," she slurred
glaring at me. "I'm a big girl. I can make choices
on my own. I'm not even a little bit drunk."

"Not right now you can't. You're slurring
your words. Ever clear makes you drunk before
you even know it."

She flared her nose. I would have laughed
at how cute she looked angry if it had been any
other time.

She snapped her head to Jet. "I want my
drink, Jet."

Jet frowned. "Sorry Ever. If Oliver thinks
you need to stop then you're not getting any more
alcohol."

Ever looked like she was ready to explode
or stomp her foot. It was very unlike her, so I knew
she was far more wasted then she let on.

She rounded on me now. "I don't know you,
Oliver, and I don't have to take orders from you."

"You do when you're in my warehouse," I
frowned. I needed to be firm with her. She was
acting childish with the alcohol in her system.

"Then I'll leave," crossing her arms she
started to storm off. I caught her in my arms
pulling her to my chest.

"Let me go."
"No. Not in the condition, you're in. I'll take
you home."
"I want to go to my apartment."
"I'm taking you to my house to keep an eye
on you," I started to pull her toward the exit.
"No," she leaned all of her weight away
from me.

"Ever, you're making a scene," I whispered
pressing my mouth to her ear. She really was
making a scene more and more of the gang turned
to watch.

"I don't care. You don't own me, Oliver. I
want to get drunk. I want to party. Just leave me
alone," she squirmed trying to break loose of my
grip.

"Everlyn, you want to get drunk?" I
scowled looking down at her. "I remember clearly
you telling me you don't want to ever be like you're
mother. I never knew her but I'd say you are acting
like her."

Ever stood stock still looking down at the
floor for a moment. She looked up at me with her
large green eyes. They were wet around the edges.
Loosening my grip on her, I frowned. I didn't want
to make her cry. Dammit that was the last thing I
wanted. In the blink of an eye, Ever's hand snapped
back and she open hand slapped me hard across the
face. My head jerked to the side. A collective gasp
echoed through the warehouse.

Turning my head, I saw the pain written all
over her face. She was torn. She had meant to slap
me for what I said but a part of her hurt more
inside than that slap had hurt me. Grabbing her
upper arm, I took her out of the room away from
all the prying eyes. She followed obediently
without a word. Not looking back once, I took her
up the stairs toward my office. She sniffed, it made
my heart hurt that I had made her cry.

Shoving open my office door, Jake and
Taylor, who had been sitting in the middle of the
floor jerked back. Clearly they had been kissing, or
about to anyways. Taylor's cheeks went dark red.

"Err...hey," Jake said awkwardly looking
away from Taylor.

"I need to talk with Ever in private," I told
him. He nodded standing and offered his hand to
Taylor.

"We'll uh be outside if you need us," Jake
said.

He ushered Taylor out. She was looking at
Ever unsure but followed Jake anyways. Once the
door shut, I released Ever's arm. She just stood
there for a moment then suddenly burst into tears.
Gathering her up in my arms, I held her and rocked
her. Sinking to the floor, I pulled her into my lap.

I rubbed her back gently. Neither one of us
spoke she just sobbed into my shoulder. Even
though I hated to see her cry, I couldn't have been
more happy to have her in my arms. She wanted
me to hold her. Even if she didn't know me, she
wanted me to comfort her. Her tiny thin arms were
wrapped tightly around my neck and her head was
buried against my shoulder. She clung to me for
dear life.

"Ever?" I asked once her tears and sobs had
slowed. Drawing her head back, she looked away
not wanting to meet my eyes. Lifting her chin, I
wiped a few stray tears from her soft cheek with
my thumb.

"I just need time” she said her voice
breaking. "I need space."

My heart torn in half at those words but I
nodded. If this is, what she needed then I would
respect that.

"What can I do?" I asked softly brushing
her hair away. She grabbed my hand and stopped
me but didn't release it. Pulling my arm to her
chest, she just held me.

"I want to go back to my apartment. I want
to try and piece everything back together on my
own."

I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I
was at a loss for words. For over a month I have
wanted nothing more to be with her, to hold her, to
have her love. In addition, all she wanted was to be
as far away from me as possible. I shook my head
trying to clear that thought out. She just needs time.

"Ok. We'll move your stuff back to your
apartment," I spoke calmly, even though a raging
storm was ripping me apart inside.

"Oliver," she whispered looking into my
eyes. "I'm sorry. I just-"
"Need space. I understand," I lied.
~Ever~

I felt as though my heart just ripped in half.
I watched Oliver sadly as Jake pulled away from
the warehouse. Taylor was sitting in the passenger
seat looking back at me not saying a word. Oliver
watched us until we were out of sight. I'll never
forget the look on his face when I told him I
wanted to move back to my apartment. It was as if
I had stabbed him in the back. He looked so hurt.

"You alright, hunny?" Taylor asked.
Looking up at her, she smiled.
"Yeah," I muttered. I knew she didn't
believe me, I didn't believe me.
Jake looked in the rear view mirror at me.
"So your apartment?"
I nodded.

"Well, I'm going to have to pick the lock.
When you got attacked in the junk yard the first
time you lost your keys."

I stared at him into the rear view mirror at
his reflection feeling sick. I didn't want to hear
anything else about the memories I didn't have
anymore. It only made me angry and bitter.

"So what's Leon going to say when he finds
out about you two?" I asked trying to lighten the
mood.

Taylor's cheeks went deep red and she
glanced at Jake.
"Thanks, Ever," Jake grumbled. He was
trying and failing at not smiling.
"You know. Maybe you need a girl’s night
out?" Taylor spoke changing the subject again.
"That would be nice, eh?" Jake offered.
"Yeah, I guess."
"Well, you, me, Kimmy, and Angie could
all go out to the club or something?"
"No," I told her quickly. "Not the one here."
"Oh-" she frowned, "Well isn't there one in
the city?"
"Yeah," I nodded. "We could go there?"

Jake pulled his eyebrows together. He
didn't like that idea I could tell but he didn't say
anything.

"So...Ever?" Jake grinned.
I raised my eyebrow at him. "What?"

"Since you're all awesome and my favorite
sister and all you should let me and Taylor stay
over."

"Jake," Taylor hissed smacking him in the
arm.
He grunted. "What's with all you violent
girls? What happened to nice and sweet?"
Taylor and I scoffed at the same time then
laughed. I really like this Taylor, I thought smiling.
"Of course you can but no sex," I warned.
Taylor paled shaking her head while Jake laughed.
~Dear Agony~

I was sitting in the dark of my bedroom. It
was silent and cold, but it was fitting to how I felt.
I was in the middle of the bed with my legs folded
under me just staring at the wall. I had been sitting
here for a few hours now, and finally stopped
crying.

My heart hurt worse than any pain I have
ever felt in my life. I don't remember getting shot
but I do remember the pain when I woke in the
hospital. The infections and even struggling to
walk for week after could compare to how I felt
right now, empty, confused, and miserable. I
missed him.

A man I know almost nothing about I
missed with every fiber of my being. I no longer
dreamed hell I hardly slept. My body and soul
yearned for him. I longed for his touch. I sob
escaped my lips and I laid my face in my hands.
Why can't I remember?

The doorbell rang startling me. Glancing at
the clock confused my eyes widened. It was
Saturday night. It was girl's night out.

Jumping up I grabbed the hem of my shirt
and scrubbed my face quickly. I knew my eyes
were puffy and I looked like a wreck. I opened the
door on the second ring. Kimmy was standing in
the doorway with a grin on her face, it dropped
instantly when she seen me.

"Oh Ever," she whispered wrapping her
arms around me tightly. Taylor and another girl
who I assumed was Angie followed her in.

"Why is it so dark in here?" Taylor asked
finding the light switch. I blinked as the light
flooded the room.

"Have you even left the house at all since
the night of the party?" Kimmy asked pulling back
pressing her lips into a firm line.

"Let's not talk about it. I just want to party
and have fun," I smiled. The smile felt so fake it
hurt my cheeks. Kimmy didn't look convinced but
said nothing.

Taylor stepped forward throwing her arm
over my shoulder, "Cheer up girly. We're going to
have some fun. This is Angela by the way," Taylor
pointed at the very pretty girl with light brownish
blonde hair.

Angie grinned at me and waved. She held
up some bags in her hands, "I come bearing gifts.”
"This is going to be great," Taylor smiled
reassuringly and patted my back.

We spend two hours getting ready. The four
of us were wedged in my tiny bathroom. We were
laughing and chatting, it was nice. Taylor had flung
some powder on Kimmy by accident which turned
in to a full out fight. My bathroom floor was now
covered in white powder. Thankfully, none of us
had our dresses on yet and were able to clean up
quickly. Maybe a girls night out was exactly what I
needed.

"Everyone got everything?" Kimmy asked
dropping her cell phone into her clutch. I smoothed
out my silky black dress and nodded. Angie's dress
was green, Taylor's white, and Kimmy had on a
cute one shoulder grey dress that flowed when she
walked.

There was a nice red sports car sitting
outside, Kimmy went straight to it once we stepped
into the chilly night air.

"Who's car is this?" I asked shivering; I
hadn't counted on the December air being so cold.

"It's one of the gang cars. Jake said we
could use it," Taylor told me climbing into the
back.

"So Angie are you going to college at SU
with Taylor and Kimmy next semester?"

She turned around to look back at me.
"Yep," she smiled. "I've wanted to come to
California for a long time. When Taylor said she
was coming here to be close to Leon I thought I'd
come along and go to school here too."

"Yeppers, we've been best friends since
kindergarten," Taylor added.

"Me and Ever have been too. We grew up
in the city so we know our way around pretty
good."

"Jet and Tyler are your brother’s right?"
Angie asked.

"Yeah, they are a handful," Kimmy sighed
frowning. "I don't know what I'm going to do with
those to," she grumbled shaking her head.

"So Ever?" Taylor asked as Kimmy and
Angie kept talking.

"Hmm?"
"You won't tell Leon about me and Jake
will you?" She asked biting the inside of her
mouth.

"Why don't you want him to know?" I
laughed, as her cheeks got darker.
"Well Leon is like really over protective."

I shook my head before she was finished. "I
might not remember my time with Jake or Leon
before but I can tell you that Leon will be happier
for you to be with Jake then someone else. Jake is a
great guy."